The Llama Encounter-DEc 4, 2008

A couple of weeks I was out on a lovely late fall run with my beloved Garbage Hound, Quenton and my bff's beloved Lion Hound, Tucker. We were running on a trail behind the Saranac Lake High School that we've each run on at least 50 times-always with out a leash. Quenton, being a curious Garbage Hound, sometimes gets distracted on runs and requires help to get back to the group. So when Tucker and I were cruising along and noticed Q was missing we did what we always do and went back to get him. If his distraction isn't major-a squirrel or bird- he rejoins us quickly, if it's a biggy-a cat or fresh, hot bag of garbage he likes a little bit of a chase. When we discovered him it looked he had treed a cat, he was barking furiously and a saw some brown fur moving around. As Tucker and I got closer to the scene I saw more brown fur and realized it was not a cat, Quenton had discovered Sasquatch in the middle of the village of Saranac Lake! The thing was shuffling around, it had long brown fur, and was the size of a Snuffleupagus! Tucker stuck to my side like glue, when we realized that Q was barking through the fence at the biggest llama I've ever seen. He just kept circling the tiny pen that was attached to the back of a broken down shed barking at the top of his lungs. Tucker and I gave chase and Q quickly slipped under the cobbed together fence and was face to face with the giant brown monster. These are the parts of subnormal dog ownership that make me ask why he survived getting hit by a tractor trailer 9 years ago? I started to worry that I was never going to get him out on my own, so I decided to go find the owner of what appeared to be a junkyard full of broken down cars with one shed for the llama and another for the humans (the human shed cam complete with a tarp on the roof). As I walked across the driveway I noticed a small mob of neighbors standing at the bottom of the driveway so I asked "do you live here?" And an old man replied, "no, but the guy who does is not going to appreciate this!" No shit! So Tucker and I headed to the front door and I prepared myself to get shot. I'd had a dream the night before that I was in a plane crash but I woke up before the cabin filled with water, so I was convinced today was my day to die and I was probably going to get shot by a gun from at the scary house with a llama hidden in a tiny pen behind the shed. I held Tucker close on a leash now because he's not a subnormal dog and I figured he loved me enough to attack my shooter. I yelled hello a couple dozen times on my way to the door, so they wouldn't be surprised when I finally did knock. I knocked and tightened every muscle in my body, ready to take the shot, and waited. No one came to the door-oh shit, do I leave my now unbeloved Garbage Hound and hope he can someday find his way home?! I've been in some messes with Quenton before, but this was the worst! Suddenly Q was silent! Totally silent and backing away from the llama. For the first time in one of his big messes he looked to me for help-uhn what? He came to the side of the fence by Tuck and I and I clipped his leash on over the fence, passed it to my other hand under the fence, and snuck my baby under the fence to freedom. I've run by a couple times since then, always with dog on leash, and I see the scary shack of a house, I see the junkie cars, I see the shed, what I don't see is the goddamn llama!